Nestle in…

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Nestle in, it’s the start of the cuddle weather.

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I love rainy days, for me it’s my favorite weather especially when you have a tiny munchkin huddled up closely with you indoors.  It’s the start of the monsoon in the Philippines and I don’t particulary like getting wet, I just love staying indoors, drinking my favorite cup of coffee in my favorite knitted sweater from Promod.

What about you? Do you love the rainy days?

Sweater: Promod | Leggings: Forever21 | Photography: Matte Box Productions

Revisiting Suyac Island

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I’ve never seen a place blessed with naturally beautiful, exquisite flora and fauna with abundance of hidden islands and the sea.  I’ve been to Sagay City a couple of times but I wasn’t able to fully explore their neighboring islands.  I was asked to visit Suyac Island recently but I declined because I can’t leave my baby yet and I am also busy for the entire month of July.  So to take part of the experience, I shall be blogging my personal journey when we visited Suyac Island last year.

While me and my friends were doing our Negros trip, we stayed at Sagay City for three days to attend a wedding and visited the boyf (now the husband) back then.  On our very last day we visited Suyac Island.

Suyac Island is a Mangrove Eco-park, it’s pretty cheap, tranquil and it’s something different from the normal island hopping we usually do in Cebu.  You’re jump off point is the port of Old Sagay, where there are tourism staff ready to assist you.  My friend and J bought foods to be cooked in the island.  The fees being collected are used to fund their coastal clean-up and for the island’s eco-tourism project, so you see, that’s money put into good use.

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In the island, you will find century-old mangroves and a sturdy footbridge which takes you around the island to see and experience nature up close and personal.

It’s best if you visit the island during low tide and wait for the water to rise during high tide, so that you can walk around the mangroves and enjoy the mini dipping pool once the water rises.  They also have the perfect viewing deck and a mini sand bar if you want to bathe under the sun.

With each picturesque view, Suyac Island is surely a great place to visit with your family and friends, not only you have the perfect vacation but you are also helping in maintaining nature’s wonderful creation.

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I’m a SUPERWOMAN (My birth story)

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I guess I was one of the lucky ones who enjoyed her pregnancy to the fullest.  I loved the usual food trips with friends, no lines because you’re pregnant, VIP parking space, healthy food and sometimes you get your usual cravings but along with these great advantages is the common fear by most pregnant women, the fear for the big DAY.

I was due to give birth from April 11-15, 2016 but some of my friends told me that it might be a week early or a week late.  Few weeks before my due date the mister already told me that he might not be able to be present when I  give birth to our child, so I already prepared myself, mentally, emotionally and physically.  My mom was also reluctant of having me to go through long trips because she’s afraid I might pop along the way.

I, on the other hand, read lots of books and blogs about the pain during labor.  I wasn’t so familiar with contractions because I seldom get them, sometimes I only feel a strong electric urge in my pelvic area but I rarely get them, so there was no constant feeling of how labor really feels.  I’ve watched  a lot of youtube videos but I cringe to the sight of how painful it is.

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But on that faithful 3rd day of April, while me, my mom and grandma ate our dinner after church.  I felt a sudden urge to pee, it felt not the usual discharge down under.  I went to the toilet and saw tiny specks of pinkish color discharge on my panty liner.  I checked my notes and read that sometimes this is what they call “the bloody show” and labor would normally start a day or two after the show, so I was just calmed and went back and ate my steak.

After eating I wanted to pee again, so I went ahead for the second time.  I never felt any strange feeling at all, we went home right away and I went straight into my room because I wanted to pee for the third time.  I messaged my cousin and asked her how does labor feels? While checking all my hospital bags, I washed myself and changed to wear my maternity pads, I was checking my phone when I felt the most bizarre sensation and ran immediately towards the toilet.  I was like, “Was that what I think it was?” I messaged again my cousin and changed my clothes again.  I carried all my bags and smiled at my mom and asked her, “Kung naay tubig pero di kaayo daghan tubig slight lang, mao na bana?” (I think my water just broke but there’s not much water, is this what I think it is?) with a big smile.  Good thing my mom did not panicked, she just stood up, changed and we drove right away to the hospital.

It was around nine in the evening when we arrived at the emergency room and trust me, I did not feel anything at all.  They took me directly to the delivery room because my water just broke.  The doctors checked if my bag of water was still in tact and how dilated I was.  While they were checking on me, all I could think was “Is this really it? I’m not yet ready! I haven’t messaged my husband, my phone? Wait my mom, does she know what is happening?”  All those thoughts were bothering me and when the doctor told me that I shall be admitted, I was like “NO, This is not happening.”

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I was then brought to the Labor Room, they whisked me with so many wires and so many machines, some nurses, interns or doctors were checking on my contractions, asking if I feel any pain and all I could answer was nothing.  At a scale of 1-10, I told them zero.  All I can feel is the uneasiness of the discharge, I was wearing an adult diaper and had troubles peeing because I was hooked with so many wires.  They gave me some medicines to help me with my contractions but after four hours nothing has changed.  The pain scale was still three.  They told me to sleep because it might take awhile but I couldn’t sleep at all.  I was up and I was just feeling the movements of my baby.

At six in the morning they gave me my breakfast and told me that they might increase the dosage of the medicine, I was okay with it since I never felt any pain at all.  After three hours they checked on my pain scale and I said around four.  I was even chitchatting with the interns because I was really bored doing nothing.

After lunch, they increased again the dosage and warned me that I might start to feel the pain.  I was still doing okay two hours after.  But at three in the afternoon, I started to feel the sensation at the back of my spine.  I felt a wave of contractions, it wasn’t the worst pain yet but it was too much than my usual contractions.   At five in the afternoon, the worst of all the worst pain started already and my pain scale jump from four to seven.  It was not what the books had told me, nor the blogs had described it, this is not what they call the worst menstrual cramps, this pain was much much worse than anything I’ve every felt and trust me I am not exaggerating at all.  I am not a wimp, I’ve had my fair share of painful tattoo stories and bikini wax sessions.  I broke down and told the intern I couldn’t do this anymore, the pain was just really bad and I think I was going to die.  Good thing I was the only person inside the labor room, I was able to shout, banged the bed, punch the wall and I even started to stand up to ease the pain.  I was asking my doctor how was I doing? But sadly,  I was still 6cm, 100% effaced and everything seems to be slowing down.  The contractions were sharp and painful.

When the doctor checked again, I was already 8cm, 100% effaced but it’s getting slower and slower, at six in the evening I was starting to get discouraged, I was holding the intern in-charge and I felt sorry for her because I was holding her too tight.  I was slapping my butt to ease the back pain, draped over the side of the bed, laid down, stood up, doing the cat pose. I shouted violently and called my mom for help hahahaah!.

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Worst, I was also thirsty but I was no longer allowed to drink any fluids, so I was irritable and annoyed and when the doctor checked I was then 9cm, 100% effaced, it was quite a relief but she can see my baby’s head and told me not to push yet.  I shouted at hear with plea, crying and laughing at the same time that I wasn’t the one pushing it but it was my body trying to push.  After fifteen minutes I asked the intern to check again how dilated I was but I was still at 9cm. So I pleaded and asked the doctor to check again and again but they were afraid that there might be an infection because my water already broke.  Desperate and helpless, I experienced waves of pain and pressure to an intensity that I never thought existed.  I was grunting and growling already, I felt I was possessed with bad spirits because I couldn’t believe that sound emerged from me. Finally, when I reached 10cm, my doctor told me to practice pushing. We did a couple of practices and right after the Doctor saw my baby’s head it was go-time.

Everything was so fast and a blur because everyone was  busy prepping up.  I was asked to transfer to a wheel chair and all I could think of was to push this baby out.  When we arrived at the Delivery Room, everything was like the ones I see in the movies.  When everything was all set, I can hear everyone was cheering on me, I started with two small pushes and his head came out very fast.  I felt the sudden rush of water and relief coming out from my pelvis and then I felt happy and like a wonder woman  after I made that one final long push and used up my body’s strength to get my baby out.  They pulled him out and everyone was shocked because he looked so big, it was because he had this super cute chubby cheeks.  They put him on my chest and all I could remember was his warm touch and how tiny he is.  He cried for a short time but was already comfortable on my arms.  He stayed there for almost an hour while the doctor was fixing everything down under.  I was just staring at him, holding him.  I was tired but I can’t seem to take my eyes off him.  I was about to tear up but I was distracted by the questions of the doctors and they had to take him to be weighed.  That took almost 24 hours of infinite labor pain but it took only 7 minutes to deliver by bouncing baby boy to the real world.

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I stayed at the recovery room to rest but after two hours they woke me up because it’s time to nurse my gummy bear.  It was our first getting to know stage, I had some help latching him but he won’t suck on my left breast so I always had to offer the right one.  Everything was more calmer now, just the two of us inside the recovery room.  When he finished nursing, they took him to the nursery to run some few tests.  I was then transferred into my room when I saw my mom gazing at the nursery area.  She finally saw her first grandchild.

When I arrived at my room, I was surprised to see my friends, it was already 11 in the evening so I didn’t expect to see visitors that late, but my dear friend really lived up to her promise that she will be present on the day I will give birth to my little warrior.  I was able to rest for an hour but was asked to go back to the nursery to nurse my baby.  He was still not allowed to be roomed-in with me because they have to run a few tests.  It was all a struggle, I was still in pain and trying to move was always a challenge.  But I guess I was an ultimate survivor since I was able to walk 5 hours after I gave birth.  I was still feeling groggy from all the medicines that were injected and I still have wires getting along the way.  Even if I was not allowed to take a bath according to some old wives tale, I insisted.  It was difficult yes, but I can’t be a wimp and cry over to my mom.  I had to be strong for me and for my baby.  The husband was always calling to check up on my needs, he felt guilty because he wasn’t present to help me.  I, on the other hand, felt relieved because the postpartum experience became a breeze for me.  It made me stronger everyday, I was gaining back my strength and on the day that we were discharged, I was doing well already.

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I am just so thankful that it was not as bad as I thought it would be, I had this fear of being admitted to a hospital and getting wired up with so many things.  But I felt braver now, tougher as you may describe it but the most important thing is how amazing it feels to be complete after seeing and holding my baby.  I couldn’t be any happier with my life.  Being a new mom, brought me some moments that I felt like a superwoman, that I am proud that I have survived and was able to pushed my body to do something to the extreme.  This feeling of accomplishment and strength is really unmatched for.  Yes, pregnancy was a challenge even though I enjoyed it and being in labor was hard.  It was painful, but it was the kind of challenge and experience that I would go through a thousand times over just to be able to see and hold my precious little warrior Sven.  I am so thankful for this one of a kind experience, it was amazing, it was intense and I finally understood the real essence of being a Woman.

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Welcome my Little Warrior.

Sven Jadmielle Veloso-Selma | April 04, 2016 | 7:32 p.m. | 6.8 lbs

 

Riffles or Ruffles?

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I think everyone knows that I gave birth to a happy bouncing baby boy but before everyone learned the gender of my baby, most of my friends thought that I was carrying a baby girl.  I think there were only two or three people who have guessed the correct gender of my gummy bear and that includes my husband.  I am so grateful for the outpour of excitement and love for our tiny miracle.  My closed friends were present during the Riffles or Ruffles Gender Reveal Party and everyone had a blast during the party but how we gathered our friends and prepared for the Gender Reveal was more thrilling.

Three days before the party proper, we went to our doctor and asked her to write down the gender of our baby.  She happily obliged and even put the paper on a double envelope so that it’s properly sealed, of course the mister and I made sure that we wouldn’t be tempted to open it.

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After our doctor’s appointment we then bought stuff for the party, arranged the cake and of course groceries for the food to be cooked during that day.

The mister and I together, with my crazy friends prepared the decoration and constructed a cute blue and pink theme at our dining area. I was very excited because there is nothing more special than to celebrate the welcoming of our tiny miracle, the new beginning for our growing family.

Everyone was betting on their individual guesses but I had a feeling that I will be having a girl most of the clues from an old wive’s tale is saying that I am having a girl. But the Chinese Calendar says it will be a boy while the Himalayan Calendar says it will be a girl.  I was hoping that it would be a girl but the mister was praying that it would be a boy but either way we don’t really care as long as our tiny munchkin is going to be healthy and strong.

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I decided to do a DIY Pinata Lantern for the big reveal but we let our stay-out helper to put the confettis whether it’s going to be a girl or boy.  I was really tempted to take a peek but I was glad that I was able to control myself.

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When the time came to pull out the surprise, I was pretty shock that it rained blue confettis on our dining table.  Everyone was shocked as well because majority of my friends voted for a girl.  Of course the mister was still reluctant about the result, he thought that our household helper wasn’t able to understand my instruction and put in the wrong color so we read the paper and it really said that we are having a BABY BOY.  Even though it was a bit late but the mister jump with glee.

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We couldn’t be any happier! The mister is pretty excited to meet our little warrior.  The party ended with sweet conversations with my closed friends and it was everything that I ever wanted.  We were surrounded by the people we love the most and of course I was in the comfort with my family.

An Ode for Sven

 

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Sven my darling,

I’ve carried you for nine months and was always wondering how you would look like.  Every time I would hear your heartbeat, my heart also skips a beat as if we are beating as one.  With every poke, kick and movement, I kept counting the days until you are born.  The moment I saw you, I had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to hold you always.  I was smitten by your smile and how your cheeks looks so cute and puffy. 

You are beyond perfect, you are my beautiful boy. I wanted to tell you how much I love you, how much this love is so consuming, protective and fierce. That I would fight for you, that I would die for you and that I would do anything for you.

I have endured these sleepless nights, tiring tasks, zombie walks just to make sure you are well taken care of.  Every nappy change, bath time, feeding time is always my golden hour and I want every moment to be perfect, knowing that this only comes once in my life. 

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You are amazing, you are perfect.  I want you to grow up as a brave one but with a gentle heart.  I want you to have a life full of love and joy, a life where you are free and a spirit that can inspire others.  I want you to grow up to be a gentleman, hands that care for others and a heart that is genuine and kind.  I want you to be strong, to be independent to decide your destiny.  I want you to face life’s realities with a brave soul, you are my little warrior and I know you will fight for what is right. 

My darling Sven, my heart will always beat for you and every time I look at you, I look at the world with so much hope for your future.  I love you beyond the galaxies in the sky and I will never stop loving you until my last breath. I will protect you from all the troubles in the world.  I will shelter you from all the negative people who wished vile things towards you.

You are one tiny miracle that God has bestowed upon me, you are my greatest love. Thank you for your chubby cheeks, for your amazing coos, your lovable smile, your funny giggles and your sweet face every time you cuddle right beside me.  You make me fall in love with you everyday.  

I love my Gummy Bear.  Thank you.

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Photography By: Matte Box Productions

Dress: Liberty | DIY Flower | Lace Cardigan: Forever21 | Lace Top: Forever21 | Inner Lingerie: Victoria Secret | Hat: Cotton On | Make-up By: Moi